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#341 grassmatch

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Posted 24 April 2015 - 12:50 PM

The Greatest Lie Ever Told !!
 

 


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#342 grassmatch

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Posted 25 April 2015 - 07:16 PM

A boy and his father were playing catch in the front yard when the
boy saw a honey bee. He ran over and stomped it.

"That was a honey bee," his father said,"one of our friends, and for
stomping him you will do without honey for a week."

Later the boy saw a butterfly so he ran over and stomped it.
"That was a butterfly," his father said, "one of our friends, and for
stomping him you will do without butter for a week."

The next morning the family had sat down for breakfast. The boy ate
his plain toast (no honey or butter.)

Suddenly a cockroach ran from under the stove. His mother stomped it.
The boy looked at his father and said, "Are you going to tell her or
should I?
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#343 mibrains

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Posted 16 May 2015 - 08:40 AM

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''



#344 mibrains

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Posted 16 May 2015 - 08:41 AM

''A Dyslexic man walks into a bra''


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#345 mibrains

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Posted 16 May 2015 - 08:50 AM

''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

 

:lolu: 

 

:bong7bp:



#346 mibrains

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Posted 16 May 2015 - 08:51 AM

Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one - and let the other one off.


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#347 mibrains

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Posted 16 May 2015 - 08:52 AM

A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds, ''But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal.''


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#348 mibrains

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Posted 16 May 2015 - 08:53 AM

I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.



#349 mibrains

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Posted 16 May 2015 - 08:57 AM

A seal walks into a club...

 

:( 


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#350 grassmatch

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Posted 16 May 2015 - 10:07 AM

^^^I privately lol'd, when nobody was looking.... :ph34r:


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